Comments on naijablog: I am a married woman! I am a married woman!

I am a married woman.Also DEAD, died laughing!!!! ...

2007-10-06T19:55:00.000+01:00

I am a married woman.

Also DEAD, died laughing!!!! some (other) lazy bugger suggested you do RSS feeds for your blog. Wouldja please? too much trouble reading opening (slow) pages to read archives...

So because a woman chooses to adopt her husbands s...

2007-05-28T00:19:00.000+01:00

So because a woman chooses to adopt her husbands surname she is automatically backward ??

you my friend are suffering from what they call colo mentality.

I am a married man. I once had a disagreement with...

2007-05-17T11:16:00.000+01:00

I am a married man. I once had a disagreement with a guy on a business issue, the next thing he is telling me, i am a married man who has a wife.

My reply "and so f***king what"

Hahahah! yes oh! As a single lady, I have also bee...

2007-05-09T00:24:00.000+01:00

Hahahah! yes oh! As a single lady, I have also been thrown the "I am a married woman" syndrome, from friends that only last year were at clubs shaking their booties! These days, the answer to all questions and situations is "I am a married woman". Yes, being married is only secondary to "I am a mother", the two together, and they are now indestructable!

eh please, not to derail the topic, but how is tak...

2007-05-08T17:28:00.000+01:00

eh please, not to derail the topic, but how is taking your husbands name backwards?

Gosh some people, if you dont like it dont do abeg...after it is not only in naija that ppl change their names upon marriage, and in that same naija sef, a lot of women never change their names legally, but just call them mrs so and so when officially they remain ms. whatever whatever

and also those ppl you know that kept their names...lol how many do you know have legally changed their names but are still informally referred to by the maiden name

sorry to derail your topic jeremy, but when ppl heap abuse on our backward nigeria just cause they feel like it, abeg! its not cute

My man what are you saying-being married is a lice...

2007-05-08T16:51:00.000+01:00

My man what are you saying-being married is a licence in Nigeria to be respected.I mean look round and see how your fellow men look down and talk anyhow to unmarried girls and see how they treat married women with a lot of respect but dont think its bcos we are special but one of their subservient servant in the house.Have you seen a married woman having an argument with even ordinary driver on the road and the next thing you hear is i have your mate at home.And bcos we pay too much price for using that title(mrs)we have now assumed that being married confer priviledges to us anywhere

not only spanish women also Islamic women. also t...

2007-05-08T16:41:00.000+01:00

not only spanish women also Islamic women. also traditional Yoruba women. All keep their names upon marriage.

Lol!! What a psycho!@ Pseudo - If you were a woman...

2007-05-08T14:38:00.000+01:00

Lol!! What a psycho!

@ Pseudo - If you were a woman, I would dare you to try doing the 'keeping my maiden name' thing. You'll be appalled at the responses you get, even from women!! I have brought up this topic many a time. A large number of Nigerian women regard it as stupid to not want to change your surname. Contrast that with the Spanish attitude where women automatically keep their names and the children do the double-barrel thing. I know what a fight it would be were I to insist on keeping my name. For the sake of peace, I'd probably let it go. We're so backward it stinks.

At the risk of going off point, were I to be femal...

2007-05-07T14:28:00.000+01:00

At the risk of going off point, were I to be female, would I bear Mrs mynigerianhusbandsname? No way! I think the tradition should be tabood into a bin of rotten fish

ps: this is not to say am not female

I am an umarried woman!sniffsniff*What am I to d...

2007-05-07T13:40:00.000+01:00

I am an umarried woman!
*sniff*sniff*
What am I to do?

Do Nigerian men really only learn respect for women when they are married? answer: to a large % yes. Not only the men but the entire society.

"...In London I used to be a very aggressive/compe...

2007-05-07T10:34:00.000+01:00

"...In London I used to be a very aggressive/competitive driver. I'm a lot more chilled out in Nigeria, but it is a bit tricky to always keep your cool when you are surrounded 24/7 by terrible/inconsiderate driving..."

That's why you drive, with your left arm out of your window? *:D*...seen you a couple times swing lanes on "that" road while I'm minding my biz... :)

2007-05-07T09:51:00.000+01:00

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lol to put another spin on it, maybe she was tryin...

2007-05-07T05:08:00.000+01:00

lol to put another spin on it, maybe she was trying to tell you to be careful, tht her husband was gonna beat you up, since she couldnt do it herself loooool

I suppose she meant - I'm a married woman, I coul...

2007-05-07T00:51:00.000+01:00

I suppose she meant - I'm a married woman, I could sick my husband on you. At least thats what I drawn from my run ins with such married animal...er i mean women, in Nigeria.

but jeremy you have hadly changed. you are still ...

2007-05-06T22:50:00.000+01:00

but jeremy you have hadly changed. you are still an aggressive and competitive driver!!

Anonymous-before-2-plus-2: I agree it wasn't the b...

2007-05-06T21:41:00.000+01:00

Anonymous-before-2-plus-2: I agree it wasn't the best behaviour on my part to bang on the bonnet. I felt bad about it immediately. In London I used to be a very aggressive/competitive driver. I'm a lot more chilled out in Nigeria, but it is a bit tricky to always keep your cool when you are surrounded 24/7 by terrible/inconsiderate driving. What to do?

What sort of tradition is this? why on earth, at t...

2007-05-06T21:31:00.000+01:00

What sort of tradition is this?

why on earth, at the Hilton of all places, is she claiming to be a married woman? Is this the way of the Nigerian woman?

with the most innocent of faces, i would have been tempted to give the following reply in the most subtle/almost quiet manner: "you are not a married man! you are not a married man"

abeg don’t let them drive you crazy in naija - you particularly have to be aware appearances may well be deceiving; you cannot judge a book by its cover.

but i like the manner in which you promptly expressed regret - the apology!

Interesting story Jeremy..but I find your question...

2007-05-06T19:20:00.000+01:00

Interesting story Jeremy..but I find your question even more interesting. Setting aside the comments that turn this situation into a 'he said-she said', etc. Your question, as I interpret it, asks why do some Nigerian women feel that she obtains societal validity by carrying her marital status on her sleeve.

There is no short answer to your question, particularly since I haven't been to Nigeria, and the only Nigerian people I know are the young men playing football for my University's team. But it sort of reminds me of Asian women here in the US who marry white men and immediately make a point of mentioning to everyone that their husband is white. As if to show that the color of their husband's skin -and the husband's anglo last name, serves as a shield or sign of prestige in their communities.

lmao !!!!!Buhahahahahah !!Welcome to Naija !!Chai ...

2007-05-06T18:07:00.000+01:00

lmao !!!!!
Buhahahahahah !!
Welcome to Naija !!Chai ...na so dem dey do oooh !!
If u arent married in that country na big wahala !!
You will be suprised her husband prolly panel beats her daily ....but all she knows is she is married !!!
May God help us women folk in that country !!!

Can I add my two penny's worth. The women should a...

2007-05-06T16:29:00.000+01:00

Can I add my two penny's worth. The women should all go get a life. Earn realy money, do something that makes them happy and just about hope that their so-called husbands are not at it with the nanny, gateman, cook, cleaner, you name it etc.

Not surprised Jeremy, MRS is the altimate acolade for the average Nigerian young woman aiming for RESPECT.

I think your behaviour is totally out of order Jer...

2007-05-06T16:18:00.000+01:00

I think your behaviour is totally out of order Jeremy. So what she cut you up. You don't have to be such a bully and behave like brute. You have really gone down in my estimation Jeremy with this vile behaviour.

Kola I disagree most Nigerian women even when they are not in a threatening situation like to let the world no about their marital status. So much so that a friend insulted me recently with: At least I am married. You will die single. Of course I responded by telling her that I'd rather die a single woman than experience her current marriage. Marriage and motherhood seems to be the only credible status giving to women in our society. This is a great pity and this is why they have to shout at the top of their voice.

maybe she meant you're being a chauvinistic male b...

2007-05-06T13:57:00.000+01:00

maybe she meant you're being a chauvinistic male bully who thinks he can oppress her with aggression..maybe she was saying I'm sitting alone in a car but dont think you can bully me because you're a man....I have a husband who can meet you on the brute force level you seem to be trying to reach out to me on...I think your assesment of the situation is unfair. You're too quick to judge her as some nitwit who thinks being married is a mark of respect...she's a woman...who's car's been hit by a man who she clearly cannot confront in the same way. I prefer to assume she's a basically intelligent person and that might be what was going through her head...than to assume the worst about her and perhaps (if you're honest with yourself) Nigerian women in general.

Funny how realisations get confirmed quickly. I r...

2007-05-06T10:17:00.000+01:00

Funny how realisations get confirmed quickly. I realised that the Nigerian understanding of the word 'saucy' is that it means rude. (Elsewhere, saucy means sexy - but it surprises Nigerians to think that it could possible mean that). But perhaps saucy-as-rude is an archaic/implicit meaning that has been preserved through colonial English?

2007-05-06T10:02:00.000+01:00