Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Challenging Nigeria's Sexual Taboos

Read the story of Dorothy Aken'Ova - a Nigerian sexual health worker and Nigerian hero (in an interview with the BBC's Linda Pressly):

In her office in Minna, northern Nigeria, Dorothy Aken'Ova breezily unlocks the door to an inner store room. Inside, next to hefty academic tomes on sexual health, gender and development, is a simple wooden display cabinet.

I am momentarily startled by the brightly coloured rubber and plastic articles on show - especially as this is a Sharia state where jurisdiction is based on Muslim law.

Dorothy takes me through her collection of sex aids and toys. "We have dildos, vibrators, nipple ticklers, clitoris massagers, gels, lubricants, condoms," she says. "This is the beginning of our sexual health shop."

Dorothy is the founder of the International Centre for Reproductive Health and Sexual Rights - Increse, a non-governmental organisation.

Fundamental to Dorothy's approach to sexual health is a commitment to teaching people about sexual pleasure.

So her collection of sex toys and aids has a very serious intent: she believes that enhancing sexual pleasure not only improves communication, but crucially, also minimises domestic violence.

"If people want and believe in sexual pleasure," she says, "they will know that battering a woman is certainly not romantic and isn't one of the ways of achieving pleasure. So teaching sexual pleasure may be one way of ensuring women aren't beaten in their own homes."

Domestic discord
We head out to the predominantly Muslim community of Paiko, a 20-minute drive from Minna. Dorothy has an appointment with the local government council to discuss the progress of a new couples' support centre - the first of its kind in Nigeria.

The initiative came about after Increse did a survey in the area, and found that many people highlighted a lack of harmony between couples, and anxiety about the number of divorce cases.

For Dorothy, the most surprising thing about the study was how open people were.

"There's an assumption that in the traditional north of Nigeria, people won't tolerate discussions about sex. But we found the community very open and willing to talk about many issues of sexuality, including sexual intercourse."

Local council chairman Baba Salihu Danjumo is supportive

Despite coming from the permissive, "anything-goes" capital of the UK, even I find Dorothy's directness occasionally disarming.

But her passion to promote sexual health and well-being leaves no room for coyness. And in an office crammed with local council members, only one of whom is a woman, the chairman, Baba Salihu Danjumo, is equally unfazed.

There will, he says, be private counselling sessions at the new centre where people can discuss pleasure, sexual dysfunction, infertility and family planning.

In fact, the council is so impressed with the project conceived by Increse, it is putting extra resources into the centre, and renovating a further building for young people.

Dorothy is cock-a-hoop, and tells me: "It's such a misconception that people in the north are closed and don't welcome development. This community is ready for a new start. I'm really impressed."

Self-esteem
In Increse, Dorothy has created a unique organisation. Apart from teaching the young people who flock to the Increse centre in Minna from all ethnic and religious communities and doing outreach work in places like Paiko, Dorothy is committed to challenging taboos.

Nothing is off-limits. So there are workshops on unsafe abortion, seminars on rape, discussions about teenage pregnancy. And recently she created a network for bisexual women and lesbians.

There are no public meeting places in Nigeria, like cafes or bars, for women who are attracted to other women, and nowhere their health needs can be addressed.

Through Increse, Dorothy has chosen to challenge the prevailing silence around homosexuality.

So far, she has organised three secret meetings of Igonet (Increse Girls Only Network) in a hotel in Abuja.

The general manager of the hotel, Idris, has decided the risk he runs in hosting the get-togethers is worth it.

"The hotel could be set ablaze if the word got out, but I'm proud to be assisting Dorothy in her work", he tells me. "She's seen things lacking in the Nigerian system and she's trying to change them."

I was introduced to some of the women who had met in Abuja. Fortune, a 20-something student from Lagos, told me how wonderful it was to be with other women like her in a safe environment, and get reliable information about sexuality.

Pamela described how her self-esteem had risen as a result of being part of the network.

These women feel safe in Dorothy's company. She throws her head back and laughs uproariously at their stories, but her mission is deadly serious: to challenge the inequalities she believes exist in Nigeria, and fight for an end to discriminatory practices.

More info here and here.

8 comments:

Anonymous,  3:29 pm  

Dorothy is doing amazing work and we are so proud of the work she is doing in Nigeria. Thank you Jeremy for bringing her to the naija bloggers attention. She seems more famous abroad than in Nigeria.

Imagine if we have at least 4 more Dorothy!! For change to happen, you only need a few determined and brave people.

once again, thanks Jeremy for bring this woman to our attention.

Fred 7:10 pm  

Yes, this is exactly what Nigeria needs more off: nipple ticklers.

Yay for nipple ticklers!

Waffarian 1:32 am  

Well done Dorothy! hip hip hooray! Somebody that is not afraid to talk about an activity that the whole country seems to be doing and enjoying it at that! We are 150 million for heavens sake! hahahahhahah!

Anonymous,  10:40 am  

I applaud dorothy for what she is doing but BUT my concern comes for her secret abuja hotel meetings. She is not living in a communist state but in Nigeria, West Africa. Homosexuality is banned, while AI and other human rights organizations deem this unfair it is the culture of the people and way of life. One isnt saying it doesnt exist, but she should not be trying to put sand in tthe good work she has already started, for if it is known it could jeopordize her organization and the good it stands to the counrty. Respect the culture of people even if you dont agree with it. In England you can be gay, red or blue and if you dont like it take a hike. In Muslim countries women cover, if you dont like it, pack your load. Isnt this whats happen in the uk, wih the debate about veiling? Respect the culture of other, good on you Dorothy once more.

Jeremy 11:24 am  

Last anonymous: you make it sound like culture is such a static entity. Things weren't so different in the UK/West a few decades ago. Social change comes through pioneers pushing at attitudes, like Dorothy. Also, I'm not sure you are right about acceptance of homosexuality not being part of African culture. In fact, it is the rise of fundamentalist religions that has spread intolerance, where before, many forms of sexuality were embraced and accepted in diverse African cultures. A few minutes conversation with an ethnographer will put you right on that one..

Chude! 11:09 pm  

I couldnt have asked for a better response to Anon. It is funny how we don't understand our own histories. Diverse sexualities are not our culture? Excuse me, which culture are we talking about here? The Tiv culture? The Aniocha culture? The Lampese culture? The Erin-Ijesha culture? Which?

Anonymous,  1:05 am  

exactly chude. well put jeremy and thank you for raising this issue and for all those bloggers out there who are standing up for up for it is right.

marcelle,  11:21 am  

IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THIS IS NOT WHAT NIGERIA NEEDS RIGHT NOW? I KNOW THAT WE ARE QUITE HYPOCRITICAL,BUT THIS SEEMS EXTREME. HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT THIS IS DOING TO YOUR TWO SONS DOROTHY? I KNOW YOU ARE HAPPY DOING WHAT U DO,BUT THOSE KIDS NEED A MOM WHO WILL BRING THEM UP IN THE WAY OF THE LORD AND NOT ONE WHO SELLS DILDOS.SEX EDUCATION IS ONE THING, BUT ALL OF THIS IS DOWNRIGHT DISGUSTING

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