Monday, May 14, 2007

Nigerian names

The way things get names in Nigeria is a constant source of amusement/puzzlement. People can call their children Napoleon, Wethankgod, Prosperity, Scholastica or Godspower. The same goes for schools. Here are some sample school names:

Holy Ghost Juniorate
Greater Tomorrow Secondary School
Hope High International School
Mictec International High School
New Horizons College
Oyewole Twins International Secondary School
Paragon International Group of Schools
Infant Jesus Academy
Isolog College
Lifeforte International High School
Nickdel College
Funtaj International School
Christ Ambassadors International College
D-Ivy College

Shouldn't they put 'League' at the end of the last one?


Anonymous,  1:12 pm  

those are still cool chekout the names of churches. take a drive to Badagry and will will count over 1,000 churches on that strech and the names?

MsMak,  1:26 pm  

"Holy Ghost Juniorate"??!! As in, are you for real? My goodness. I think i have heard it all now. They should have just stayed with the formula of using the owner's name instead, a la Igbinedion schools, Apata Memorial High school, Vivian Fowler, et al.

I also knew of Aunty Ayo school, and Oxbridge Tutoroal College. Three guesses for where that name came from (rolleyes)...

Anonymous,  2:14 pm  

are you laughing at them or with them?

Dimples 3:07 pm  

LOL...that was funny...laughed @ a few of them....I have to say a few of them are actually good schools...Oh thanks msmak for shouting out to my secondary school.

Bitchy 3:24 pm  

There can't be a school called Holy Ghost Juniorate!! Tell the truth. You made that up.

Anonymous,  3:34 pm  

There's an "ASSFOOD International School" in Lagos and a shoe shop called "Feet First"...



have u heard of Edidot college?? i kid u not, first time i saw it i thought it sounded a bit like Idiot college!!!!!!

Anonymous,  4:28 pm  

here is the website for Holy Ghost Juniorate

I kid you not!!

St Antonym,  4:35 pm  

Funtaj School, I bet, is a conflation of "Funsho" and "Taju," who are probably the two children of the proprietress.

Does anyone remember Yetkem Snacks on Allen Avenue? "Yetunde" and "Kemi," obviously.

Agaracha 5:09 pm  

Those are the things that make Naija special, as for the names ..check out Ogoni folks English names ...anything from Jerusalem to DOgood to Godpower :)

goke,  6:06 pm  

Na una sabi. At least, you can't say it's for want of imagination.

Confessions of a moody crab 6:33 pm  

What of Rock Foundation Primary school, Ivory Foundation school, Redemption Primary School and Sedis Serpentia Secondary School!!!


Anonymous,  6:59 pm  

I really don't see what the promblem is?

Snuffleupagus 7:42 pm  

Have you done any research to see if the name of the school reflects its successes and failures?

Or would a rose, by another name, still smell as sweet?

Snuffleupagus 7:44 pm  

Have you done any research to see if the name of the school reflects its successes and failures?

Or would a rose, by another name, still smell as sweet?


The names of those schools are hillarious! As for the names Nigerians give to their children, I have heard from my Malawian friends that their names are wilder. I can't imagine being named 'Holy Ghost' or something equally amusing and 'excentric'.

Good one.

Nigerian Woman in Norway 9:51 pm  

my school was called st. saviours until the board realised that there is no saint called saviours.

then they changed it to our saviours.

ababoypart2 12:46 pm  

In Mbaise, we go even further. Look for a name in the Old testament, and there is an Mbaise brother or sister with such a name.

The names of the schools are not as bad as the names of the churches...

Ogoja Princess (aka Mama) 3:32 pm  

LOL... this is too funny.
loving your blog. check mine out. im a newbie.

The independent monkeys 5:54 pm  

Perhaps this could pass as the only constant humour in our history.

Kevin 12:33 pm  

You missed my favourite: Titsall Global Schools, near the Rockview hotel in Wuse II.

I used to walk past it often, looks like a bit of a dump but the website manages to make it look quite shiny.

Anonymous,  5:10 pm  

lol scholastica is a saints should do a post about ibo ppl and the saints names they pick lol bonaventure, scholastica, sixtus, callistus, hippocratus lol...

i also went to lifeforte. pretty darn good

Anonymous,  5:11 pm  

lol i went to st. saviour's too but i dont think the name has been changed, least the one in ebute metta
yup no saint know as saviours

Idemili 5:53 pm  

You mean 'Ibo Catholics' surely? And not even that. The two Schlasticas I know are not Igbo.

Smoothvibes 7:43 pm  

lol..soooo true. Nice post

Anonymous,  2:23 pm  

What's in a name? I bet you went to a "Federal Government College..." Think about it...does that name make you REALLY feel so 'COOL' now? And as for the rest of you who attended the Edokpolor colleges and Obakhavbaye grammar schools of this world.... well....

exceptional mama 6:01 pm  

Our names are what identifies us wherever we are and hopefully reminds us of why we were given those names cos trust me, we always have a reason for them.
You may make fun of it all but remember that some people who read your blog may bear such names (thank God I am not one) so tread softly softly. Cheers

exceptional mama 6:09 pm  

The names might sound funny to you but please have a care for those that actually bear the name,or school in them cos they are the ones that live with it.
Apart from that, you do come up with the most interesting things.

Anonymous,  4:16 pm  

but the names are silly and funny.

Anonymous,  8:23 pm  

Behind our cousin -in- laws' back, we mock her childrens' names: , Victorious, Trust In the Lord ("Trust" for short), and a couple more dreadful unbelievable names. Imagine our shock/horror when we heard a man in the queue at Heathrow for a Lagos bound flight call his son Victorious to order, as in "Victorious! Settle down!". Proving of course, that 'normal" is a relative thing.


When people are confused of what to write, they seem to amuse other by writting articles out of their Ignorance.How can somebody in his right thinking sense abuse my alma mata-Holy Ghost Juniorate Ihiala.This is a school that came into beign in 1954.Founded by the Holy Ghost Fathers (Missionaries) and named after the congregation.For Gods sake this is a seminary school and not just a secondary school.The school has trained many well meaning Nigerians and foreigners alike since inception.apart from priests, there are many proffesional in all walks of life that attended this school.the writer of this article should visit the School.

Anonymous,  3:25 am  

i am mad at the fact that you are making fun of then names...its even worse that i actually went to INFANT JESUS ACADEMY. Let the name not fool you, I was born in America..but that school was so good...and it really isnt a random name seeing how the Infant Jesus is a symbol and there is a College in like the UK or something with the same damn name...lay off!

Anonymous,  4:59 pm  

to be sincere with ya folkes.. i really do not get wat all this fracas is about.... can someone pls explain????????????

Anonymous,  1:57 pm  

funtaj is a conflation of funke n taju not funsho n taju

Anonymous,  1:58 pm  

they r nt d two children

Anonymous,  9:17 am  

Those names are Funny!!!!
I really do not care if they had "great" people or bladi blah trained in them; they still are ridiculously funny names!!!! You would find them equally amusing too if you had a bone of humor left in you. Speak truthfully, what were your first thoughts the day your parents announced you were going to attend HOLY GHOST JUNIORATE or INFANT JESUS ACADEMY!!! Common now..... Bet you all were fighting back the laughter.

poundedyam419,  4:36 am  

one of my best friends in nigeria was named bimbo (girl) lol.....and then there were names such as mystery, gift, precious, sunday, delta, and sparrow....oh, how i miss abuja and the pounded yam!!

babyblues 8:13 pm  

Bimbo my dear is a Yoruba name. It's sad for her that there is word "bimbo" in American diction. They are both pronounced differently but I'm sure Bimbo is just the short form of the name and i bet all the Bimbos in America go by a different name. But all the other names are RIDICULOUS! and to those lame people who are offended...get a life!!!

olamide,  1:32 pm  

i'm a nigerian based in paris, and i was in assfood from primary 2 to primary 5. i left nigeria in 1998. if anybody remember Olamide, give me a sign. thanks

kachi 2:44 am  

There is no sense legitimizing ignorance. that a tablet of panadol can write on the chalkboard doesnt make the stuff a writing material. Get it straight, the term JUNIORATE is a technical normenclature in the Catholic Church that connotes a formation house or seminary as popularly known. This is a house where children who desire to get specialized attention towards their journey to a religious vocation are trained .Though the setting is similar to that of a secondary school, they are intrinsically different the same way a juice drink is different from a ogogoro even though both are drinks. In Nigeria there some other juniorates which follow after the religious congregation that owns them. Thus the one established by Holy Ghost Fathers (the earliest set of missionaries that evangelized the south -eastern Nigeria) is called Holy Ghost Juniorate. At Urualla , Imo state, we have another juniorate named Charles Heerey Memorial Juniorate , which the Immaculate Heart Sisters built in memory of their founder, the late Archbishop Charles Heerey of Onitsha Catholic Archdiocese (himself one of the early Holy Ghost Fathers ). At Bende in Abia State, there is another juniorate by name Mercy Juniorate established and run by the Mercy Sisters. Mercy Sisters is another female religious congregation founded by another Holy Ghost Father, late Bishop Anthony Gogo Nwedo, of the Catholic Diocese of Umuahia. The Holy Ghost Fathers as dedicated set of Missionaries were reputed for integral human development and empowerment of the of the populace they came to evangelize. Without any fear of equivocation, i would tell you that all the popular catholic schools in the then east central state you can remember today was built and run by Holy Ghost Fathers. Today, the group is still championing the course of quality education nationwide. Its present Provincial Superior Fr Augustine Onyeneke is a retired professor of Sociology at the University of Nigeria, Nsukka. Its current Onitsha Regional Superior Fr Peter Agbonome is a professor of Architecture at the Nnamdi Azikiwe University, Awka.
Coming to Holy Ghost Juniorate itself, the school has continued to maintain its high academic standard since inception. We are not one of those schools that look up to WAEC result as a yardstick for achievent. For us that is a given. Our strength is measured when tested against other seeming high grade schools. For instance in 2006, when Nigerian Model United Nations Society brought together well-over 135 adjudged best secondary schools in Nigeria, and in collaboration with Federal Ministry of Education and also in conjunction with all the Foreign Embassies in Nigeria, Holy Ghost Juniorate came tops and was awarded the "Best School Delegation". The award was jointly presented by British and Swiss High Commissions in NIgeria. In 2007, under controversial circumstances, we came second. That led the school to boycott the 2008 edition which was won by Loyola Jesuit College. Do we need to say more. I wonder

zainab 12:42 am  

lmao...funtaj is a very good international skul..i went dere..its constututes of funke nd tajudeen, not funsho nd taju..nd they re not kids of d proprietress..its d proprietress nd her husband..

zainab 12:44 am  

funtaj is a very nice international skul..its made up thru d proprietress nd her husband..not kids..funke & tajudeen ibrahim.

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